So this is it, the last day of my trip and I’ve been so happy. But everything is crashing down now, I’ve had too much time to sit and think and read.  I’ve ended up back in the beginning with a gapping hole in my chest and no one to talk to about it.  It was getting harder to picture you, to remember moments, and then I closed my eyes to sleep and there you were, perfect just like you always were.  It’s taken me this long to realize that no one, no matter how similar, will be able to replace you. And I’m sure you aren’t even thinking of me anymore and you’re probably nothing like you were then but I can’t help it.  No matter how much I know this is bad for me, I know I should be dating and going out with friends and trying to forget you but I’ve tried, honestly and I miss you just as much now as I did almost 8 months ago.  I’m misserable and I always will be no matter how many masks I hide behind, I can’t bring anyone down with me anymore.  Now it’s time to make other decisions…

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